You heard me.
But the plain truth of the matter is this: I wanna eat good...
I mean, just look at us. Five years, I woulda stepped off the side walk to let the 2012 Danny pass.
The more of this food we ate, the more we started to understand that, evolutionarily, we'd gone just a step too far.
Let me explain.
Back when Kathy and I would have been cave man and wife, we probably would have been foragers. That means we'd spend part of the day scrounging around for food. Okay, maybe we ran a little co-op style restaurant that the other cave people ate at, but let's not get ahead of ourselves.
In all that food gathering, in order not to expend more energy than we were taking in, our brains, via signals from the body (which I'm starting to think is the place where my real intelligence is found...my body tells the truth, while my head is always filtering the present through the past, maybe not giving me a true picture all the time), told us to not run for seven hours and eat only an apple, which made the chasing a deer less appealing to our Lazy Self-Preservation Feature.
Don't move more than you can back it up with food.
Should we climb to the top of the tree and get the fruit or start with the one's at eye level.
Hey, I was gonna take that one.
I know, can't you see us arguing over the low-hanging fruit?
But you get me.
There was a delicate balance between moving and eating that we paid attention to back in the cave days when we moved a lot more than we do now.
Now? Geez, I remember spending 8 or nine hours, minus bathroom breaks and lunch and shuffling off to sit in a room not my cubicle for hours to have a meeting, again back on my butt, the Chair, the ultimate symbol of evolution.
"Not now, I'm sitting," some guy or gal said, smiling proudly from atop a stump, then later, a light weight, movable stump, with ornately turned legs, and maybe little felt pads so they don't scratch the hardwood floors.
They were they envy of the cave clan.
"Oh, how I wish I could just sit all day, maybe looking at a screen, typing my answers so I didn't have to get up, maybe just to use the bathroom or go meet with other people, but we get to sit all day..."
Careful what you wish for.
But, uh-oh, what happens when the Forage and Hunt, because people like us will make food for you if you trade for money, can be reduced to a car ride, hardly getting your resting pulse above 70, maybe, on the walk to and from the parking lot?
If you watch your calories, maybe you can do it, but make sure the people are making your food from ingredients that are wholesome.
"Wholesome" - an adjective which describes food that's generally considered good for you, not the word on a label of a cereal box. Honest-to-goodness food made with minimal culinary intrusion on it's intended natural state.
But realistically, if you wanna eat good these days, you're gonna have to take a step backwards, a step back away from a time when you could trade ready-to-eat food for money and you had to gather wholesome foods, preferably organic (because the herbicides and pesticides where made by the people who we employ and charge with making our food...if they're spraying the food or adding chemicals, we have to take back responsibility for our food safety and start to shop with our brains).
And maybe chop with our hands.
100 or so years ago, you could eat just about anything on the Earth because it was free of chemicals. The water was clean and so was most of the air.
Now, you have to maybe be a little more selective and discerning.
And, practically, you'll be making some of your own meals.
Customers who like our food and start to make it on their own because they like it make us happy.
We don't say, 'they get it," because we think everyone gets it but not everyone wants to explore the world of the kitchen, which has become our world.
But at least be discerning.
Shop with your brain.
Your body will thank you.
And, if you wanna drag your knuckles with us, drag out a knife and a cutting board.
And get chopping.